Right here

You keep him in perfect peace

whose mind is stayed on you,

because he trusts in you.  

Is. 26:3

You know, Jesus, that when I pray for peace, I’m actually saying, “Jesus, please take away all this mess and chaos. Please bring calm. Please get me out of this.” All right, You know that when I am honest, that prayer goes even deeper.  “Jesus, make me strong enough to fix the shame I feel at getting into this mess to begin with.”

What I want is for my life to be calm, manageable, something I can be proud of. What I want is to know that I’ve got this, Jesus. It’s all good. Seems reasonable. Except that I can’t seem to get out of my messes. I just keep creating them, or they create themselves, or others create them. I’m always in the middle of some kind of chaos. 

While I’m continually praying for peace and actually meaning that please, Jesus, I want to just be enough to handle all this, I want to fix it, You’re saying I am missing the point entirely. 

The peace is right here, right here, daughter. It’s Me. Your mind is steadfastly set on yourself and on your troubles. You’re staring at that mess, churning along right in the midst of it, crying out for Me to give you peace, but the peace is right here. 

Look up. Look at Me. Steadfast peace will only replace the steadfast turbulence of your mess when you decide what you are going to think on. Who you are going to look at. Be honest, My daughter. You do not pray for peace but for me to justify Your lack of it. Instead, why not try My way? Looking at Me. Letting go of your need for the mess to be OK, and just trusting Me instead. You are OK, and more than OK, because I am right here. The peace is right here and has been here all along. Lift up your eyes and find it.